1. In hindsight.

    2013 has been a weird year for me. I think this is a pivotal year in my life. My move and decision to live alone is a very small fraction of the more important things I learned and developed this year.

    I have come to terms with the things I do not like about myself and have come to accept that I do not have to please any one who do not want me. I’ve also learned to live more frugal, little-by-little. Yes, I still shop around. But, now, I know to use fully what I purchase. I have also seen my future a little bit. I’ve been living alone for 8 months and it has been a roller coaster. Through 8 months of introspection I have identified relationships that can be kept and those that I am willing to throw away to breathe easier. I have also learned to dismiss the things that make me feel like crap. I have learned to appreciate more the people who are always there for me, no matter what.

    This morning, I was thinking of what I’ve accomplished this year. I don’t want to overstate my accomplishments. But, I feel like I have not done enough. I’ve crossed out a lot of things I wanted to work on for 2013 and that makes me happy. And the ones I missed out on continuously are what disappoint me. And from this morning, I was unsure of the new things I want to accomplish for 2014.

    This year has been all about me. Me, me, me. I have been extremely selfish this year. I still think my decision to move here is very selfish of me. I’ve robbed my parents of a child to take care of them. I’ve robbed my friends of a good time with me. I’ve robbed the people who need me of the help that I usually give to them willingly. So, for 2014, I plan to decrease my selfishness. To extend my blessings and possession beyond what I know.

    I know I need to start helping others just as others have helped me get to where I am right now. I aim to donate to charities for what I believe in this year. I aim to live as frugal as possible and channel the rest of my possessions to people who can make better use of it. And finally, I plan to open myself again to the possibility of actually falling in love. I think I just missed an opportunity because I was too scared to be hurt again. I need to remember always that pain is sometimes a necessity to feel joy. I need to take a leap of faith in 2014 on a lot of things I’ve held back on recently in order to move forward with my life.

    I thank all the people who have kept me company this year. To those who have kept me sane during a lot of times that I seriously thought of just quitting and falling over the edge. Thank you, thank you, thank you! You know who you are so thank you! :) Let’s make 2014 even more awesome.

     
  2. image: Download

    Choosy ka pa chaka ka naman! :)) #pakak

    Choosy ka pa chaka ka naman! :)) #pakak

     
  3. 20 Friends I am extremely thankful for in 2012

    These people are the most I am thankful for. All my close friends from various barkadas mean a lot to me. But these people made this year extra special in their own little ways.

    1. Cyrille Adalia

    2. Belle King

    3. Elisha Paquing

    4. Karen Carreon

    5. Rhen Francia

    6. Claire Sandoval

    7. Kei Somabes

    8. Jason Singson

    9. Marc Garcia

    10. Kristian Valenzuela

    11. EJ Pestano

    12. Lara Jacinto

    13. Jasmine Siy

    14. Larisse Tapel

    15. Lovelle Camacho

    16. Gemi Ablaza

    17. Netaj Campos

    18. Petiz Pacana

    19. Enzo Flores

    20. Bona Guttierez

    I’m thankful for all these people from making me laugh whenever I’m with them. Thank you for making me laugh without knowing you do, at the right time. I’m thankful to these people for bearing with me throughout this year. Thank you for making each day at work and life bearable and fun. You are all important to me and I would hate not to see you all for a long time when I leave the country.

    Love you friends and thanks for all the memories I have of you this 2012. :)

     
  4. Best of 2012

    We are just a few hours away from formally concluding all 365 and 1/4 days of 2012. And like every close of a year, lately, I will blog and share about what I’ve learned and encountered all year long. I will try to keep this as short as possible.

    I closed 2011 a little bit sad knowing two of my close friends from high school ended their relationships with their boyfriends. I was sad because I was somehow friends with their, now, exes. The great thing about this was that this led my friendship with these two girls and the rest of our barkada to be much better. We hung around every week, drinking, crying, drinking, recollecting, drinking, crying and drinking some more. It was very expensive, but definitely worth each penny we spent. We’re rich anyways! :) We also got to travel to a far away place just to have fun and to experience a fresh environment. Fitting as it is, we witnessed a fireworks display during our trip to Thunderbird. It was just a reminder to us how beautiful life is regardless of who left you, but more importantly because of the people you are with in the present.

    At this very same time, I faced the dilemma of leaving my employer to seek better opportunities and a bigger salary to support my ridiculous lifestyle. I did get what I wanted in my employer and did not have to leave at all. But then, I found out that money isn’t every thing. For a few months more, I was incredibly bored and generally out-of-sync and hating my decision. This was only changed when the real challenges came in at work. I received a really tough account and had to work through it on a dual-role. Although in months later, I helped to shape a support team which was well-oiled that was capable of shaping exceptional employees. In this designation, I formed myself to be a better employee and to actually form a working principle and adhere to it. It was a hellish experience for a few months but all is better now, thanks to the resilience of our team and to the support of all the people I worked with. Because of this, our team was awarded as the best within our department, which just confirms how well we have become in the past 10 months. All this is thanks to our functional lead and to our consultants who worked tirelessly and patiently even under exceptional scrutiny.

    Getting a fatter pay check also gave its perks. This year was a spending year for me. I spent a whole loads of money on clothes, travel, food and liquor. I also threw some money away on a gym membership which I stopped going to after 4 months due to my lack of focus. It was mainly because I lost my trusted iPhone while on commute. I don’t like to think of it as a trade-off for my pay check. Rather a learning lesson for me to be extra careful. So I bought a new cheaper slower phone and am stuck with it until today. And it’s kind of broken because I lost it’s back cover 2 days ago. I can’t get any consistent reception. Perhaps, because that back cover pressed some mumbo-jumbo on my phone. Probably, not my best year gadget-wise this year, right? Anyway, I’m looking forward to becoming an iPhone user again the coming year. Just a little more wait for me.

    My work frustration during the middle of the year led me to a trip to Thailand with one close female friend from college. It is an unforgettable experience because I traveled with only one person to a different country. Also, because I got to ride an elephant, touch and walk with a tiger. And I got to live a short-lived simpler life abroad because we only ate extremely cheap food beside the street with cockroaches crawling in the area. It was a great experience though because I never imagined myself eating that kind of food. Plus, I got to shop more abroad in non-existent shops here in the Philippines plus other goodies I can’t find locally. Every travel creates a new experience for us, definitely.

    A good distraction I had from work was when I joined our company’s volleyball team. I actually hesitated from joining because I knew absolutely no one outside my team. To my surprise, I managed to make more friends! Friends that I had fun with during our nights in training and some meals after training. Also, inside the work area, I had a bit of fun with these people. I guess I managed to overcome my shyness with my love of the sport. And ended up knowing more fun people who I somehow stay connected with until now, off-season. 

    Love-wise, I can’t say it’s been a really good year for me. But it was better this year because I got to go out on a few dates, especially early on in the year when I had time-off from my friends. I got to meet several people and actually felt really good about myself. I also had the chance to go out with someone I really like. But it isn’t all well. I’m almost no longer talking to that guy. Or rather, he is the one not talking to me anymore? Anyway, lesson learned, I don’t need anyone else’s help to feel good about myself. No one has to believe it but me, as Rachel Berry would put it. 

    Towards the last quarter of the year, I got to take a very long overdue beach vacation with my high school barkada. I say this with all happiness because we traveled as a huge group of 11 people! I never thought we could have pulled it off given our huge headcount, but we definitely managed. This gave me some time to relax, laugh and laugh every minute, and to drink some more without regard to the next day. I also got to smoke again and watch an amazing poi dance beach-side. It was such an experience because I also got my ear pierced. I always wanted to get it pierced but never had the courage to do so until that trip. It was definitely fun because I was with all of my close friends and had tons of laughter with them.

    Also during this year, a good friend who has lived in the US for a long time now came to visit us as a surprise. It was definitely fun because I got to be with all of my close barkada from our HS varsity team. Although it was a brief visit, it got us all together to sit down together to eat, chika and rampa for a whole day. And just this month, I got to go out with 2 people from the same barkada a whole lot. I think we’ve been seeing each other every week since the start of December. We always go out to rampa and never lose topics and people to talk about. Being with these people means a lot to me because I get to be extremely balaj! 

    I would say the biggest game changer of 2012 is when a quarter of our house was submerged in water for 3 long days. It definitely opened a lot fear in me. My fear of leaving the world, my parents leaving me and actually losing a lot of material things because of a natural disaster. It also created a minor phobia in me. Now, when it rains hard, I can’t sleep so much worrying that I might wake up again with rain water actually inside our house. Because of this disaster and also with the loss of my iPhone I thought that life here in the Philippines would not be very fruitful for me.

    And on October, my Visa was approved. I got a job offer in the US for a permanent position. An opportunity for a new life, an actual fresh start. And now, I am just counting my days here in the Philippines. It is very painful to think that I’m leaving a lot behind but also excited to look forward to a whole lot more experiences in a different land and culture.

    Now, as I am writing this, I feel very thankful for this year, like any other year. But this year is very special to me because I actually got to spend a lot of days with special people in my life. New experiences and new learning that I will take with me my incoming challenges and obstacles. This year has opened a whole lot of fear inside of me but I will not let it overcome me and my pursuit to turning my dreams into reality.

    I thank my family and friends for an amazing year. For sticking with me throughout the year. For making each day mean a lot and for creating special memories with me. I will do my best to never forget all of these, especially when I move to a new country to start a life, seek new friends and create more experiences. 

    2012, thank you for giving me a challenge and giving me a lot to think about. 2013, I look forward to battling each day with the same resilience, if not more, I have each and every day I live. 

    If you manage to read until these words, I can only impart this as my biggest learning this year: Live each day as if it were the start of a new year. Make each day count and create special memories with the people you go come across with daily. 

    To my family and friends who I will be leaving behind, remember that I love all of you and there is not one day I will spend abroad when I won’t miss each and every one of you.

     
  5. 10:22 26th Dec 2012

    Notes: 766

    Reblogged from vogue

    image: Download

    vogue:

Merry Christmas from Vogue!
See our slideshow: From the Archives: Winter in Vogue.
     
  6. 21:06 25th Dec 2012

    Notes: 248636

    Reblogged from rxnrm

    it’s not christmas on tumblr without this

    (Source: bonvivantx)

     
  7. 10:29 23rd Dec 2012

    Notes: 3680

    Reblogged from metaphoricalexistence

     
  8.  
  9. 2012 Travels

    1. Thunderbird La Union (Feb) - Super had fun feeling ala Anne Curtis in No Other Woman! :) The farthest and longest travel I’ve ever had. Definitely worth the time & money with these super friends!

    2. Bangkok, Thailand (Jun) - Celebrated my close college friend’s birthday overseas. One of my very impromptu and impulsive travels by far. It was definitely an experience travelling cheap! ;)

    3. DLS Charles Huang, Batangas (Sep) - Went to this college retreat because of a super close friend graduating. Had some fun catching up with friends from old days and finding some very few worth keeping. =D

    4. Boracay, PH (Oct) - Biggest travel of the year going to Boracay with 10 super friends from our high school class! Missed these babies so much because we all haven’t been together complete as a group since summer of 2011. Had so much fun going crazy drinking with these bad ass bitches!

    5. Antipolo, Rizal (Dec) - A simple Christmas get-together with my college blockada. Missed these people so much because I ditched them multiple times this year. Got so wasted drinking with these people and had so much fun playing beer pong for the very first time. 

    One pending travel with HS friends again this Saturday to celebrate the birthday of  one of my thunderbirdies in Tagaytay/Batangas. :)

    I love to travel. I wish I can travel with these people again, soon! 

     
  10. image: Download

    You call yourself “Fat Amy”? 

    You call yourself “Fat Amy”? 

     
  11. 16:04 16th Dec 2012

    Notes: 2

    Reblogged from yezzir

    image: Download

    yezzir:

my blockada’s christmas get together :)
almost complete!

this year’s celeb was memorable. going to miss the one next year and many years after… :(

    yezzir:

    my blockada’s christmas get together :)

    almost complete!

    this year’s celeb was memorable. going to miss the one next year and many years after… :(

     
  12. image: Download

    (Source: peteneems)

     
  13. Word Vomit: Ramon Bautista

    I remember yesterday, me and two friends saw this book by Ramon Bautista in Powerbooks. Then we were like, oh okay, I wouldn’t waste my money on that book. We aren’t Ramon Bautista’s fans nor haters. 

    At least for myself, I would probably say that I’m not a fan because we think a little bit similar. He says the truth, I say the truth. For me, the tweets I see from him just takes commons sense for people to realize those. It isn’t rocket science to know what he’s saying. Probably, the bigger problem is that his fans aren’t too comfortable hearing the Ugly Truth about them and everything and everyone else around them.

    That hasn’t been very hard for me so maybe that’s why I am not a big fan. So when I see a friend retweeting one of Ramon’s antics, I’m like, “Oh okay.” 

    Not that I’m saying that people who listen and are fans of Ramon are lame. It’s just that they can save a whole lot more time doing introspection and saving money to buy other much much meaningful things.

    xoxo

    word vomit

     
  14. 00:46 1st Dec 2012

    Notes: 49759

    Reblogged from spektacular

    ollymoss:

Another day, another wasted lunchtime. 

    ollymoss:

    Another day, another wasted lunchtime. 

     
  15. 00:43

    Notes: 1888

    Reblogged from fuckyeahglee

    This applies to someone I know. :) HAHAHA I knew it! He’s still not over me! xoxo

    (Source: zaynofthrones)