Anonymous said: hi po jejejejejje im anonymous
who are you??
Keep it classy..
Anonymous said: hi po jejejejejje im anonymous
who are you??
This is to the straight guys who were liked by a gay guy at some point in their life.
I want to understand a few things.
You were really good friends, like borderline best buddies. But when gay guy tells you he likes you, you go MIA as if you didn’t know your friend anymore. It wasn’t a secret he was gay. It’s no longer a secret he likes you. So, why do you choose to ignore him? Does that make you a stronger person? Does ignoring the gay guy who fell for you make you more of a real man? Don’t you think it’s rude? Don’t you think you hurt your friend?
You used to tell each other secrets. Like who you think are hot girls and who he thinks are hot boys. You used to tell your friend you were probably getting dumped by the girl your courting. Or he used to tell you there’s this person in his family who doesn’t like him being gay. You were a source of comfort for each other. So why is it that when your gay friend tells you he likes you you basically tell him (if you didn’t verbally say it) to fuck off? Does that make things easier for you? Does that make you feel better about yourself? Don’t you think your friend is now having a hard time and cannot confide with anyone? Don’t you think your friend is now on the verge of mentally breaking?
You used to be comfortable around each other. You’d walk around in public with arms across each others’ nape. You used to hug each other like bros to make the other feel better during the rough times. You used to text each other when you were peeing or pooping or when you were in the shower. You used to make fun of how the other looked for a date and how ridiculously over the top the other’s outfit is. And now all of a sudden you don’t want your friend to even slide a finger off of you. You don’t even want to see your friend’s shadow after he told you that he’s fallen for you. All of a sudden, it was as if you were disgusted by the presence of your friend. Does that help you cope with the truth you just learned? Does that help you sleep better at night? Don’t you think your friend is now ashamed of letting the truth out? Don’t you think your friend now feels disgusted of himself because you think he’s disgusting?
When your gay friend tells you he likes you, did you ever think of your friend before doing any of the things you did (or are doing)? Did you ever consider how he felt afterwards? Don’t you think that after basically unfriending him completely he feels so sad because he just lost an important friend? Don’t you think he now regrets his actions, even the way he felt about you?
Did you ever feel compassion? Why couldn’t you have just spared your friend some love? You know, he probably didn’t think you two would be together. He knows your straight. But he certainly hope there’ll be a day you’ll both be together. Maybe now while he’s single. But ultimately, he just wants you to know that he loves you so much that he would be willing to walk the ends of the earth to comfort you and fight all the nasty shit who dares mess with you. Ultimately, he just wants to stay friends with you without having to keep a secret from you.
I don’t think there’s no shame in being liked by a gay guy. It is just another confirmation that you are indeed likeable. That someone would like you for your goofy and nasty self. And when you reciprocate that love with ignorance it just tells the world how arrogant and selfish you are.
So help me understand, why do you do these things?
I pray for my family, my friends, the world and myself.
It’s been forever since we talked. I think it’s been 4 years, if not more, since we actually talked. I remember when we talked that early morning I almost cried and I told you a lot about how I felt. We ended that morning and parted in seemingly good terms. But I guess you forgot everything we talked about that morning since you’ve blocked me everywhere. And I am not okay with that. I don’t like being lied to. And maybe because I’m still not over you.
You know what, I know what I did wrong. To you, I was wrong to tell all our friends that I loved you. To you, I was wrong to tell all our friends that we went to bed, twice. To you, I was wrong to tell everyone the truth. Did you ever ask me why I told them those things?
I told the friends closest to me how I felt bout you because I felt I needed to confide to people I know about how I felt and what I should do. I told the friends who are dear to me that we went to bed not to shame you but to let them know how I actually felt ashamed and used. I told our friends what I told them because I was not scared of them knowing how I felt about you and that I actually wanted to be with you. Not just for a night or two but I wanted to be with you forever. And you know what else I thought? That with more people knowing, you’d stop feeling scared of going out with me. And that you would actually love me back the way I loved you. That you would want me to be with you too.
I realized that I hurt you a lot by telling the truth. Because you wanted us to be just secret. Nothing more. But did you ever realize how that hurt me? Did you ever realize that you also hurt me? A LOT.
I still think about us to this day. And maybe it’s pathetic how I’m not completely over you after all these years. Maybe it’s dumb that I still feel like I can give us a second chance after all the pain you’ve caused me to experience.
I actually dreamt about you last night. I was with you and your family. And it seemed like we were going to be friends again, if not more. You know what part of the dream stuck? It was the moment where we were together walking in a thick crowd and you held my hand and led the way. You held my hand so tight that I can’t let go and I won’t get lost. That made me smile. Because that’s how I wanted us to be. Maybe I still want us to have that chance.
But, I woke up from that poisonous dream. And I told myself again how you’ve hurt me. You were ashamed of me and the truth. You knew I loved you and I told you that countless times and you led me on only to leave me behind later on. And that you were in bed with me twice and that both times after you never spoke to me as if I did you wrong. As if you didn’t want it.
Do you know what else hurts? You were my first. And I did with you what we did knowing that somehow being in an intimate scenario you’d feel how much I loved you and I would feel your love too. And after that you told me never to speak you again. And we went on for a second time. I remember my hesitation on that second time because I didn’t want to be told to fuck off again. But there you were, telling me that “it’s not our first time we should know what we should be doing.” And so I did followed your lead. And you didn’t speak to me again. And we never spoke again for years.
So, what’s my point really? Maybe, I am still not over you and I want to be with you in spite of all the pain you’ve put me through. That somehow you’d forgive me too for hurting you the way I did. Maybe, that’s just wishful thinking. Or maybe, my point is really to know whether you are just cruel and you knew you hurt me but aren’t enough of a human being to apologize for it.
But whatever, I don’t know. Maybe I need someone. Maybe I need no one. Maybe I need you. I don’t really know. Can you help me figure it out please?